Pic unrelated, but Rav sent it to me just prior to posting, so there you have it. Seriously, is that cat doing The Hustle or what?

Okay, so, I still get a lot of search engine hits, and I thought now would be a good time to address some of the pressing concerns that apparently drive you, the reader, to visit this blog. Let’s hop to it, shall we?

• n52 change keys

  • Just use the program that came with the driver. If you don’t have the disc, you can probably download it. Unless you want to change the physical keys, which I wouldn’t recommend.

• orphan (2009)

  • Don’t bother. Spoiler, she’s not really a kid at all. Bonus points to my roommate for figuring this out entirely based upon a scene in the trailer where she appears to be wearing mascara and eyeshadow. My ending was much better:

• how to attach a blizzard authenticator to my wow account

  • You’re welcome. When my Square-Enix security token arrives, I’ll probably do another one for that one, too. I will become the all-knowing source of attaching one-time use security tokens to accounts, muahahahahahahaha!

• on a related note, what do you do if you lose your blizzard authenticator

  • Call Blizzard’s Accounts department. Prepare to endure the 3rd degree, probably.

• welcome to thunderdome”

  • TWO MEN ENTER

  • ONE MAN LEAVES

  • TWO MEN ENTER

  • ONE MAN LEAVES

• should i stop playing my death knight?

  • Yes.

• end of the world

  • “…war came, no longer from the elemental nor from the star’s rain of fire. The world was again remade, and the glow was as the coming of the sun upon the Earth. The children of the gods were again too few, scattered and divided and among them walked the ancients and those whose thoughts were not as to the towers and the marvels, but to the End and the destruction of the Earth and to the fires from which nothing could escape.” Ethan Haas was right, gang.

• roegadyn

  • So, yeah, I’m not going to do a whole post about it because I know only like 3 people are interested in reading about it, but Square Enix updated the official Final Fantasy XIV site with all the info that’s already been leaked from Weekly Famitsu and Dengeki Playstation. Except, for some reason, for the European one.

• “sergej gorodenskiy”

  • He does fantastic banners. I wonder why I still show up in searches for him, though? Must be cached data, because the current banner, well, I did that myself.

• gelkis and magram clan centaur exalted

  • You can’t.

• death knight ghoul form

  • You can’t, unless a different DK uses Raise Ally on you.

• caravan emblems

  • … I got nothin’ for this one. Are you trying to grind rep with a Dodge Grand Caravan?

• illithid

  • This is showing up here because of a link that was on my sidebar, where someone made an illithid PC race for 4e D&D. Here it is again, in case it somehow vanishes from WotC’s forums.

Nightmarishly alien refugees from a doomed time, desperately struggling to find a different path to a better future.
Racial Traits
Average Height: 5’ 6”-6’ 2”
Average Weight: 130-200 lbs.

Ability Scores: +2 Intelligence, +2 Charisma
Size: Medium
Speed: 6 Squares
Vision: Darkvision

Languages: Deep Speech, telepathy 5, choice of one other.
Skill Bonuses: +2 Bluff, +2 Dungeoneering
Aberrant Origin: Your ancestors are alien beings from a future dominated by the Far Realm, so you are considered an aberrant creature for the purpose of effects that relate to creature origin.
Psionic Nature: You gain a +5 racial bonus to saving throws against charm effects.
Psychic Resistance: You gain resist psychic 5 + one-half your level.
Mind Blast: You can use mind blast as an encounter power.

Mind Blast, Illithid Racial Power
In a storm of pure destructive mental power, you unleash a psychic assault on your foes.
Encounter * Psychic
Minor Action … . . Close blast 3
Target: All creatures in area
Attack: Intelligence + 2 vs. Will, Wisdom + 2 vs. Will, or Constitution +2 vs. Will
Hit: 1d4 + Wisdom modifier psychic damage. Increase to +4 bonus and 2d4 + Wisdom modifier psychic damage at 11th level, and +6 bonus and 3d4 + Wisdom modifier psychic damage at 21st level.
Special: When you create your character, choose Intelligence, Wisdom, or Charisma as the ability score you use when making attack rolls with this power.

And that’s it!

Hells yeah, some actual FFXIV news. Brought to you by Eorzeapedia, apparently we’ve got some leaked scans from Weekly Famitsu about the new names for the same old (well, almost same old) faces from Final Fantasy XIV, as well as the new job paths in the “Armory System.” Let’s dive right in, shall we?

Short enough to fit on Twitter, long enough to make into a post if you slap 3 or 4 of them together. Here’s most of the stuff I’ve bought over the last month. Let’s get crackin’!

Chali 2na - Fish Outta Water. (Hip-hop) I was worried I’d get tired of listening to the J5’s most distinctive voice for an entire album, but as it turns out, no, I didn’t.

Pernice Brothers - Yours, Mine & Ours. (Indie rock) You might know them from a paint commercial. It’s probably the best track on here. Average but catchy. Bought this accidentally.

Nine Inch Nails - Year Zero. (Industrial) I know I’m late to the party on this one but that doesn’t mean I don’t get to say I like it. “The Warning” is chilling.

John Mulaney - The Top Part. (Comedy) I laughed for roughly an hour. If I could do stand-up, this is what I would want to be like.

YTCracker - Nerd Life and Serious Business. (Nerdcore hip-hop) Neither one of these is bad, but they work better together, and his best work (IMO) is still on the Digital Gangster LP with MC Lars.

What’ve you been listening to, dear readers?

“But then sometimes I’ll hear about a drink special that sounds borderline dangerous. Like a friend will call me up and be like, “Maaan, we gotta go to O’Halligan’s tonight - it is nickel shot night!”

… Yeaaaah, I’m pretty sure we’ll die if we go to O’Halligan’s.”

John Mulaney helps explain why my hangovers are nonexistent with the help of beer, but shots pretty much make me wish I’d gone the rest of the way towards alcohol poisoning!

This post brought to you by Saturday night’s party.

Obviously, the only logical thing to do now that I’ve been linked to by WoW.com is to, of course, blog about something that’s not WoW. (Of course, to be fair, they linked to the bacon sandwich post. So we’re already off to a rockin’ start.)

Vaguely spurred on by Faulsey, boredom, and nostalgia, and not finding the inspiration to rejoin WoW (seriously, I’ve been following all the news about WoW closely… and still have no urge to re-up my account, in case someone was hoping), I decided to head back to my first MMO love: Final Fantasy XI. I’m playing at a casual (some would say ‘glacial’) pace, and a number of things have changed since I last played (two years ago!), but here we are.

Let’s take a little retrospective into my history with this game, along with a list of things it does very, very right, and a list of things it does very, very wrong (that hopefully they’ll fix up in Final Fantasy XIV). Just as a warning, this post turned out a lot more enormous than I anticipated.

Ladies and gentlemen, let me just say up front that I am in full agreement with the internet of at least one thing: I love bacon. Bacon is delightful. You can eat it, you can make it your life’s work to wrap it around things, you can dip it in chocolate, and it comes in (kosher, fat-free) salt form. Hell, you can put bacon on top of every website on the internet - for example, Bacoogle, the Baconton Post, and even my own blog, covered in a delicious slice of bacon.

That’s why, when I went to Rising Roll today for lunch for the first time since its opening, I knew exactly what I wanted: the BBLT. That’s the bacon, bacon, lettuce, and tomato. When the nice lady at RR was making the sandwich, I noticed she had a great handful of bacon and was replacing a few strips back into the … I don’t know what you call it. Bacon-keep-crispy-and-warm-thing. And I thought, man, this is going to take a while.

Little did I know she was only going to put back a few slices, then put the rest straight onto the sandwich. Internet, I was not disappointed.

(Courtesy of Rav, who spotted it on The Consumerist)

Courtesy of the Failblog and my roommate, one of our local weathermen was seen on TV predicting, well, this big bucket of fail.

Now whenever I hear that annoying “Derek said it would be like thiiiiis” jingle, I’ll be forced to conclude that what he meant by “like this” was “877 degrees and a chance of West.”

Watch for falling Kanyes.

Occasionally my urge to Photoshop something kicks in, and up until I remind myself that I’m pretty terrible at Photoshoppin’, I will make stuff. After playing with some of these grunge design tutorials, I created a couple of 1680x1050 Persona 4 wallpapers. If you’re interested, feel free to download it for yourself and use it or create your own variations - as long as you share. :)

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

First off: no, I’m not playing WoW again.

However, I am pulling a Faulsey (or perhaps it should be a Llanion?) and shifting the topic here from “WoW” to “video games in general.” And maybe even some tabletop stuff. And really, whatever I feel like talking about at the moment.

But, well, let’s face it: as anyone who followed me on Midboss or on my Super Top-Secret Project saw, I pretty much always talk about games of some kind or another. Always. Therefore I’ll migrate some of my better posts from the past month or two over to here, consolidating it in one spot. Apologies to anyone who sees repeats.

So… game on!